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my veins are blue
with restless wanting;
your ghost fingers
tugging
at this untamed
hair.

stop loving me
like that, darling,

in nightmares-
kissing the stars
from my throat.

if i can’t have the sky,
i will howl my laughter
to the earth,

planting a home
in the dirt
beneath my claws.
Graveyard lurker is a nickname for hyenas. Also, they aren't like wolves who howl to the moon, they much prefer praying to Mother Earth.
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:icondlamonds:
First off, I would like to say that this is a very astonishing piece. It pulls the reader in to read it to the end.
The vision is good, but could be better. Everybody starts somewhere, though!
Originality is good as well. The words bring out a delightful embrace that explains how the writer is feeling.
Technique is great!
Impact is VERY great! It makes me smile when I read great poetry such as this. The lines "in nightmares- kissing the stars from my throat." are beatiful.
Once again, this poem really sucks me in.
Really Good job.

~Velvet-O-Matic. :D
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
7 out of 7 deviants thought this was fair.

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:icontiajones:
tiajones Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
"your ghost fingers
tugging
at this untamed
hair.

stop loving me 
like that, darling,

in nightmares-
kissing the stars
from my throat."

ouchouchouch
this feel.
thank you for writing it.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You're welcome!
Reply
:icongrimmassassin:
GrimmAssassin Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Gorgeous imagery.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 25, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconpatrikia-bear:
Patrikia-Bear Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah, hyenas are my soul animal... so this fits really well with how I am. Although I do like reaching to the stars every now and then.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Sometimes I think they are my spirit animal too. :D
Reply
:iconladyneytiri:
LadyNeytiri Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Student General Artist
...wow.
This is awesome!! ^_^
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :D
Reply
:iconladyneytiri:
LadyNeytiri Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Student General Artist
No problem! ^_^
Reply
:iconelorecohlt:
EloreCohlt Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
"stop loving me
like that, darling"

That line definitly caught me. Amazing text, as always. Actually, when I read it, I had like a melody in my head. This will be a great song :la: :stereo: :sing:
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much! :D
Reply
:icondancingdawn62:
dancingdawn62 Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is very good. I love it.

The lines "if i can't have the sky, i will howl my laughter to the earth" really strike me.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! <3
Reply
:icondancingdawn62:
dancingdawn62 Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
You're welcome. (:
Reply
:iconj-alistair:
J-Alistair Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
wow, that's really haunting (y'know, in a good way :) )
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :D
Reply
:iconj-alistair:
J-Alistair Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
No problem. I'm a big fan, so just keep on writing! :)
Reply
:icon99fluffball:
99fluffball Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
hmm..... this isnt very rhyme-e but i like it :D
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Poetry doesn't have to rhyme.
This is 'free verse'. :D
Reply
:icon99fluffball:
99fluffball Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
^^; eeyup. i have some like that i should post
Reply
:iconcrowguts:
crowguts Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013

Ever heard of free verse?
Reply
:icon99fluffball:
99fluffball Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
heheh......... yes and i noticed that after foolishly commenting >.< i am so sorry
Reply
:icongodnhumans:
Godnhumans Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Professional General Artist
kinda nice poem but i thought graveyard lurkers are wizards
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
They could be wizards too--but 'graveyard lurker' is a nickname for hyenas. They have bad reputation for 'eating the dead'--which isn't always true.
Reply
:icongodnhumans:
Godnhumans Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Professional General Artist
just like comodo dragon
Reply
:iconlithiumdreamsart:
LithiumDreamsArt Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013
good flow and smooth wording
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconsaviatwilight:
SaviaTwilight Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Student Photographer
Wow ouo very well written and emotive
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :)
Reply
:iconlightningidle:
LightningIdle Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
I have a deep-seated love for hyenas, so this is doubly amazing. >w<
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I do too! :D
Reply
:icondompteurloup:
DompteurLoup Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I agree with both the wolves and these "Graveyard Lurkers" :) Mother Earth and the brilliant Luna :D
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yes! <3
Reply
:icondompteurloup:
DompteurLoup Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I never knew that about Hyenas. I always thought them the "Joker" of their territory. New respect :)
Reply
:iconoviedomedina:
oviedomedina Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013
This is awesome!
Love it!
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconlupus-astra:
lupus-astra Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I like this, of course, but I feel like it lacks something that your other poems lack...maybe I'm just off. I think it's because I don't see as deep as an emotional backdrop the others do in this one.

But I do like how you made hyenas look and sound beautiful...The Lion King's always creeped me out haha.

Graveyard lurker certainly does paint a nice image in the mind though.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I love hyenas, and I believe they get a bad rep.
But yeah, I can see that too--
I was trying something a little different,
trying to get out from under my 'star' imagery.
Reply
:iconlupus-astra:
lupus-astra Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
But I like your star imagery.

It makes things...out of this world.

.......

okay that was really bad and dumb omg i'm sorry i'll go now
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh...I see what you did there. ;)
Reply
:iconchancerox:
chancerox Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
more untamed hair? :)
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It came from my original comment from my pic. :P
Reply
:iconartmakeslife:
ArtMakesLife Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Filmographer
I luv mother earth and this :)
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Me too, thank you! C:
Reply
:iconartmakeslife:
ArtMakesLife Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Filmographer
Your welcome
Reply
:icontheparanoidinsomniac:
TheParanoidInsomniac Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Ugh, your writing is so amazing. It's just so well-done.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconrewrote:
Rewrote Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Lovely, once again! c:
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! C:
Reply
:iconredbuick95:
Redbuick95 Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
nice!!!
Reply
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