First of all, as always, love your work. Very nice, very elegant, very eloquent especially. And I love that you're delving into new realms of imagery. Autumn isn't something I've seen you explore before, and I think you do it extremely well, and in a very original manner. I think my only real criticism here would be the line breaks. For example, when you say
Autumn wanted to learn how to
fall.
you've got really gorgeous content, but the breaks add in strange pauses. I'd much more suggest something like Autumn wanted to learn how to
fall.
It just creates less of a choppy rhythm. Other than that, I really, really enjoyed this piece. It's fabulous. Great job!
fall. Is my favorite line, but yet I love the whole thing; it's definitely a new take on an Autumn poem; I thought it was beautifully sad and dark!!! Seriously good!!!
Aw, it feels very good to find I was missed♥ I have been trying to juggle three jobs, a husband, and a social life. It wasn't working so my favorite place got pushed out D: I'm sorry!
I like the association of winter with the opposite of light... its subtle, albeit creepy.
Its a depth filled work, and certainly one of those few pieces with a levity of its own. Its... not exactly relate-able, but its introspective. Its something worth thinking about.
I think my only real criticism here would be the line breaks. For example, when you say
Autumn
wanted to
learn how to
fall.
you've got really gorgeous content, but the breaks add in strange pauses. I'd much more suggest something like
Autumn wanted to learn
how to
fall.
It just creates less of a choppy rhythm. Other than that, I really, really enjoyed this piece. It's fabulous. Great job!
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