Deviant Login Shop  Join deviantART for FREE Take the Tour
×

:icondearpoetry: More from DearPoetry


More from deviantART



Details

Submitted on
June 9, 2013
File Size
611 bytes
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
4,264
Favourites
441 (who?)
Comments
85
Downloads
3

License

Creative Commons License
Some rights reserved. This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
×
my body is a road map
of hazard signs
& do-not-touch-me's.

but on the days
when the mirror
is nice to me,
i can hear
whispering voices
like little racing
heartbeats
beneath my skin:

you are not worthless.
you are strong.
your ribcage has a meaning-

these bruises are
con            ons,
   ste     ti       & you are the Milky Way.
        lla  

-dp
Secret:

“Sometimes I like the voices in my head more than myself.”

More can be found here: [link]

Feel free to submit one here: [link] , or here: [link]

Featured: [link]
Add a Comment:
 
:icongoldennocturna:
I loved the 'road map' and 'constellations' metaphors that were interwoven with overall focus on the body; they made for great imagery and emotion. It took me a minute to grasp that the triangular shape at the end of the poem was a ribcage, but once I did, I found it to be a nice fit. The '&'s at the third and last stanza seem a bit out of place, as there are no other abbreviations throughout the poem, but you're the poet and it's your call, in my opinion. Besides, they have little effect on the impact of the poem, anyway. Keep writing!
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
14 out of 14 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

Please sign up or login to post a critique.

Flagged as Spam
Flagged as Spam
:iconrunswithbooks:
Holy crap that was amazing.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Jun 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks. :D
Reply
:iconlara0xm:
This is a powerful poem. I really like it. It took me a little while to figure out the 'constellations' part. It's a really unique way to look at bruises/physical abuse.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Jun 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you.
Reply
:iconprussianpersephone:
PrussianPersephone Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh my God.

This one...made me tear up slightly.

And not just because of jet lag--I honestly, truly, irrevocably can sympathize with this one more than I want to admit.

I like the voices better sometimes more too.
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah, my mirror is never nice to me. But I ignore it and go on.
I don't know how I do it--I really don't. My writing helps me, I guess.
Reply
:iconpippinfox:
PippinFox Jun 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I love poetry with an astronomy twist, and I have to say this is one of the best ones I've read! :)
Reply
Add a Comment: