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Writing by SnowCoveredLoyalty

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Submitted on
November 20, 2012
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"Show me your bones."

the atlas of her thighs quaked
as she misplaced her skin
in the backseat of his car.

"I'm a scorpion, you know-"

a messy promise
folded napkin-neat.

"Prove it."

& she smirked,
sure of her limbs,
her scars, & her teeth.

"I dare you to stake claim to this clavicle."
& there are fireflies
alight in his mouth,
burning her alive.
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SvalaW Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I really like this poem, it's so mysterious and intriguing. Especially the title: it gives you this picture of a dangerous, but yet beautiful and rare creature, and the poem to it just amplifies that feeling. A scorpion can shed it's old skin, just like a snake and you mentioned something similar in your poem she misplaced her skin. It made me wonder about changing character traits, a personality's true core and about staying true to one's nature.
I also really like the style of the poem and especially that you made the "spoken" words small, it makes them more intimate and you can almost hear them whispering while reading through the poem. C;
RisingWolve Featured By Owner Dec 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Short and simple but it sure tells a long story. :+favlove: I'm not sure about how you chose to end the whole thing, it's still lovely anyways. :)
MozartsNemesis Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
I love this, but im a little confused by the whole Scorpion thing. Care to shed a little light?
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Scorpio. :)
thecmq Featured By Owner Nov 25, 2012  Student Writer
I don't know whether to see this in a romantic light or a violent one xD The first stanza after the first quotation is what has me asking that. I dunno why, coz I can see where it's going and what the point is xD But the poem as good imagery, as you always manage in your poetry xD
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Maybe it's a little bit of both. ;)
DamagedHomewrecker Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
this is absolutely perfect. brilliant. gorgeous.
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!
EtherealMartyr Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I absolutely love the way that you described this... it definitely encompasses the beauty and danger of a scorpion and is absolutely beautiful.
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :heart:
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