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Submitted on
February 14, 2013
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  • Dance with fistfuls of roses, shred their petals one by one and wear their thorns like armor.

  • Write your secrets between the folds of paper cranes and tuck them safely between the empty spaces of your castle ribs.

  • Open your broken heart to hummingbirds, allow them the warmth and shelter of your arms.

  • Rebel. Tape poetry to your limbs, Cummings and Sandburg and Sexton.

  • Take a walk outside of your skin for a while, run with wolves.

  • Extinguish that forest fire that’s been curling too long in your lungs.

  • Be that lionhearted girl those snobby poets always write about.

  • Allow that cavern of stars in your throat to speak your truths in uppercase letters, in free verse yet to be proofread.

  • Write about wars and victory.

  • Be the hero.

  • Save yourself.
Someone asked me this very question on my ask forum: [link]
Figured it was fitting.
Hope everyone is having a wonderful Valentines Day! :)
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:iconyugijak:
This is well written and, well, it certainly finds an effective way to deal with heartbreak, and in ways that I find very attractive to read and imagine.

Let's look closer.

The descriptions are rather colorful, and they vary, which is a good way to keep interest.

You not only describe fanciful images, but real ones that can actually be done as well, which is definitely attractive.

Furtermore, the emotion is clearly and definably present in the writing, and that is an important thing to master. No emotion means it is dry and will seem a pointless read, even if it is not so when you get to the heart of the content.

To sum it up, well done, and keep up the good work.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
32 out of 34 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconheart809:
Beautiful diction, as always. It speaks to me - not as strongly as your other pieces, but it does.

Vision: I gave this a 4 because, although it isn't very vivid as some of your pieces are, you clearly had to notice things - consciously or not - to come up with such an accurate list.

Originality: This has a 4 and a half for having it in this format. It's perfect for what you seem to be attempting to convey. The approach - it reads like a 'how to' - is very unusual, making it original, in my mind.

Technique: See above. The other half a point is for diction and the order of words in the sentences - the emphasis is neatly done.

Impact: Surprisingly, I had to give it a 3 because - for me, at least - it wasn't earth-shattering. It didn't really hold much weight for the reader... but it was still a pleasant enough read.

As pleasant as your beautifully morbid works are. ;)
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
7 out of 7 deviants thought this was fair.

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:iconcezille07:
Cezille07 Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
"Allow that cavern of stars in your throat to speak your truths in uppercase letters, in free verse yet to be proofread."
I am in tears. This line speaks to me. :meow:
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner May 31, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
:)
Reply
:icontiajones:
tiajones Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
wow. fantastic.
Reply
:icongear-bound-deamon:
gear-bound-deamon Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
All of them are wonderful. And might I add that it sounds healthier than trying to drown it in whiskey.
We all know problems can hold their breath for a lifetime...
Reply
:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
...I was actually going to put, 'drown in whiskey' at first, but I thought better of it.
Reply
:iconchancerox:
chancerox Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
this is simply stunning. and just what i needed, as usual :) please, always keep writing.
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:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I will! Thank you!
Reply
:icongraveyardancing45:
graveyardancing45 Featured By Owner Feb 18, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
I LOVE IT. it really is inspiring and beautiful
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:icondearpoetry:
DearPoetry Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much!
Reply
:iconflummo:
flummo Featured By Owner Feb 18, 2013  Student Writer
Oh you and how brilliant you are.

"Take a walk outside of your skin for a while, run with wolves."
Reply
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